Tie dye

My past has come back to haunt me. Let me explain... Throughout junior high & high school I was very much into the 60's revival; I listened to the Beatles, The Who & Janis Joplin and donned bell bottoms, colorful bead necklaces and tie dyed tees, I even went to a couple of Greatful Dead concerts before Jerry Garcia died. My senior year in high school, I got a job at Lerner New York and my 60's obsession was put into a memory box. This past year, Hans resurrected one of my Dead Head tee's for working out, it's a little tight, but still pretty cute. Now this summer, in our community, we had a tie dying activity and I was in full force. I made 17 shirts, none of which were for me. Conrad & Riley gave specific instructions on colors and Amelia was determined to help me with the permanent dying. (Not to worry, no fancy clothes were injured in this experiment.)
I must say that I had forgotten how quick and beautiful the end result is of tie dying. I recommend this to anyone who need a fun and cheap family activity or for all you closet hippies out there. Not to fret, even a novice can dye like a pro by just google-ing and with a little research anyone can get some wicked patterns and tips on how to make your very own Deadhead jersey.

I was tagged!

Heavens, this is far too consuming, as if I needed to think about myself more than I already do.

3 joys
-Hearing my children sing the hymns in church
-Checking off everything on my to do list
-Seeing someone wear something that I've made for them

3 fears
-Completing a project that won't be exactly the way I had visualized it
-Having my car stolen again or getting in a car accident again or my car falling apart because the repairs weren't done correctly
-Becoming the person I least wish to become

3 goals
-Finishing my psychology degree
-Taking a picture of all 3 of my children that I will adore enough to put on my wall
-Becoming a vegetarian and enjoying every non-meat meal I cook

3 current obsessions
-Lost, I can't handle waiting for the next season, which doesn't start until January! aaahhhh!
-ebay, You can buy anything in this world with money
-The weather. I have to check it everyday and then worry if it's going to change and hope it will rain, so I don't have to water my garden and then check it again just to make sure. I think it's a Minnesota thing.

3 surprising facts
-I didn't learn how to cook until after I was married.
-I have had all 3 of my children at home, on purpose.
-In high school, I was Dolly in Hello Dolly, red hair and all.

Beijing Olympics Song

We would love to have attended the Beijing 2008 Summer Olympics, but we feel a little closer because our truly awesome friends Lane & Jenina Lambert, (who currently live in China) sent us the "official" Beijing Olympics Song Music Video. Although we only recognized Jacky Chan among the many popular Chinese celebrities, I must admit I get goose bumps every time I listen to it and our family loves watching the music video over and over, we even attempt to sing along with it. (You know how we love the challenge of a new language.)
The childlike sincerity of the song is so touching and the pictures of China, make me want to hop on an airplane and fly to that lovely country, maybe next year.
In any case, I hope you enjoy this little taste of Beijing as much as we did.

(Click below to see the video)
Beijing Olympics Song

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What is truly Important

Because I'm in the Relief Society presidency in my ward, every 3 month I write an article for the newsletter. The topic can be on anything I chose, (that ties into the gospel of course.) The only catch is that I must get it submitted before the end of the month. Now, one would think, I'd get it done early to avoid last minute procrastinations, but unfortunately I have yet to write that article... maybe next time. :)

I am grateful for this opportunity to express myself spiritually on paper. It's a very reflective process and time for me and I do feel my testimony grow as I contemplate what I really believe.
I'd like to thank Hans, my sweet husband, for his willingness to edit all of my articles with such ease and humor, you're the best.

New Brighton Ward Relief Society Newsletter
What is Truly Important
Monica Rawhouser

After our family van was recently stolen but never recovered, we purchased a newer minivan in great condition. Unfortunately four days later, a Semi truck spilled several 3’x 3’ sheets of steel on to our new ride. I was so angry at the driver. Our new van was not drivable and I was fuming. I walked over to the man I thought was the driver and as he was picking up the sheets of steel, I tried to yell over the passing traffic, “Your stuff hit my car!” The man looked at me, apparently not hearing my accusation and asked if I was all right.

I went back to my wrecked van and soon the police and driver came over, both asking if Conrad & I were all right. Of course we were all right; the metal hit my car not us. Then, while I was filling out paperwork the police officer noted that we were lucky to be alive and then I realized that it was a blessing that we were spared and that only our car was damaged. I had been so wrapped up in my van I didn’t even think how bad it could have been.

I suppose one could say I was being “stuff-ocated.” I was caught up in the many things I had acquired that I failed to remember what was most important, my family. It’s truly amazing that our car was the only thing damaged and that God had protected us from injury.

How can we, as members of the church, keep from being distracted? In 2007, Dallin H. Oaks discussed that we must prioritize our lives because there are many good and better things we can be focused on, but we must choose to put all of our energy into that which is best, first. Obviously that is easier said than done. How can we implement this counsel?

We recently traveled through Ohio, and I was moved by the simplicity of the lives of the Amish. They are a great example of this discipline. Their religion sets strict rules for everyone that limits all worldly aspirations. They must fill their time with work because they don’t automate their lives even though it would be easier. They are a simple and pure people, but their isolation also limits their influence on the outside world.

Our lives can be similarly directed, even in this modern world. In order to keep ourselves from focusing inwardly, we must avoid hoarding our time. The church gives us many ways to do this with callings. Because these are opportunities and not mandatory rules, we, individually must be proactive in setting personal goals. A great way of doing this is to write our goals down such as: stay for all 3 hours of church, attend the temple every month, and visit teach. Likewise we can avoid our tendency to amass “things” by paying a liberal fast offering and a full tithing.

In a recent talk by Pres. Monson, he quoted writer and philosopher C. S. Lewis who said: "If our charities do not at all pinch or hamper us, I should say they are too small. There ought to be things we should like to do and cannot do because our charitable expenditure excludes them."

The former George Q. Cannon (First Counselor in the First Presidency), taught that “it requires
a very pure people to be as honest, virtuous, humble and upright when surrounded by luxury & wealth
as when they are in poor and destitute circumstances… Always remember that your lives, your ability,
the food you eat, the water you drink, the clothes you wear, the earth you tread, the air you breathe,
are all the Lord’s. . . You will look upon yourselves as stewards, and if you have a hundred dollars
in your hands, you will say, this is the Lord’s, and if He wants it, He can have it. If you have a
million dollars, you will feel the same. And where people have this feeling, riches cannot hurt them.
Latter-day Saints must have this kind of faith and feeling, or they cannot build up Zion and be the
people the Lord is desirous they should be."

I know from personal experience that this counsel is not easy, but becomes easier as we set goals and follow through. The Lord will bless us for our efforts and we will also be comforted in the knowledge that “where our treasure is, there will our hearts be also.”

I almost forgot to tell you about the sweetest thing...

Girls can too
Laurie Hein

While we were on our Midwest trip, we stopped off at Mary Yoder's, an "Amish Style" restaurant. (The food wasn't anything to write in a blog about.) Our family scanned the menu, looking for something distinctly Amish and I always ask for a recommendations on what to order from the servers, so I thought I would ask one of the girls busing the tables that was really Amish. This was her response.

"Well, I have never actually eaten here, so I can't tell you what tastes good, but I can tell you what looks good. Hmmm. The cheeseburger, with lettuce and tomato, that looks good."

Maybe one would have to be there to understand that her response was the sweetest thing I'd heard in a long time. It was so sincere and honest, she wasn't trying to impress us at all and I'm sure the thought never even crossed her mind.

This girl wasn't the first person I've asked who hadn't eaten at the restaurant with which they worked, but her reaction was different from the others. Here are some examples of what Hans & I have heard while on our culinary journey:

"I've never actually tried anything here." long pause, crickets chirping, then they roll their eyes, and walk away.

Then their are the people that say:

"I've never actually eaten anything here." insert excuse.
-"I'm just doing this job for the summer."
-"I'm a vegetarian"
-"I don't really like ice cream, so what I like here is the bottled water."

and finally the one I dislike most:

"Well such n' such (which happens to the most expensive entree on the menu) is popular."

I wonder how I would have responded, I'm sure I would think,

"Yes, the cheeseburger looks good, but if I say that everyone will think I'm a dummy."

So I would respond,

"The organic, locally grown, free range, whole wheat, cage free, imported, fusion vegetarian tofu wrap looks awesome."
(Yea, I need to work on being a little sweeter & sincere.)

Charlotte & Elizabeth

The Estrogen level just went up by 2 bodies this past weekend. We are so excited to announce the adoption of Charlotte & Elizabeth. They are 2 month old baby bunnies from Wisconsin. They are very sweet and after only 4 days, we can see their individual personalities shining through. Elizabeth is extremely calm; we hold her in all kinds of positions and she is just so "chill." Charlotte is very cautious and jumpy and not to sure if she likes her new child owner, Riley.
Charlotte is a mini rex & Elizabeth is a lion head.

Did I mention how adorable they are?

Our New Ride

You’ve got to know when to hold ‘em, know when to fold ‘em, know when to walk away, know when to run!

Disclaimer: If you don’t like buying things and feeling you got a great deal, this might not be the post for you.

So our 2000 Grand Caravan with the Christian fishy never came back. Our insurance agent finally decided to settle and sent over an offer on Thursday. We were expecting to have to negotiate the settlement offer, but when we saw it, we were ready to sign, and I went into a car search frenzy. (* For those interested in my search process, see below)

By the time Friday night came, we had not seen any minivans yet, but we had a document with minivans that hit our criteria (<$8000, 2003-2005, <90k>

But snap out of it, we were not there for a Beamer, we were there for a Minivan that hopefully would cost as much as a Z4’s lease down payment. After a while, a 20-something Internet sales advisor named Matt appeared. I have to admit that he did not try to sell the car too much, and he didn’t try to sell me a BMW, or the Porsche Cayenne parked next to the Grand Caravan. It looked good, and it performed well when we took it for a test drive. But we needed to look at the other minivans. So when we got back, Monica returned the keys while I called the next guy on the list. Soon Monica emerged from the dealership with his offer to sell it to us “If we do it today” for $6500.

Pleasant surprise, but we went on to the next car, a 2005 Town and Country with 85K miles for $7990. Someone else was test driving it, and we had to wait until they came back. Then we realized it was the shorter version (like the Dodge Caravan), so we drove on. Unfortunately, the guy who we were going to see next, who had a 2003 Ford Windstar with 67K miles and an extended warranty listed for $7350 (and leather seats!), was upset that we had been delayed so long, and said that he had to re-schedule for Monday. What a bummer! I was really excited about the leather seats, and if it didn’t look good, I was ready to go back and negotiate over the Grand Caravan at Luxurylandia because the price was already pretty good.

So this was a little bit of a crisis since we had a pretty great "limited time" offer that might not be there in a few days (it was already below blue book trade-in), but had not really been able to compare it to our next best option. This is the point at which you need to rely on your friends, but the friends who you count on saying things like, "There are plenty of cars out there," “These salemen are trained in psychology. They know all the tricks. Do not feel sorry for them” and “Salesman are a different species.” So we returned home to student housing and went to get our kids from Mazhar and Ina Islam. Mazhar is from Bangladesh and he loves to barter. That’s the kind of friend you need to talk to when you buy a car. We rehearsed the whole story to them. Monica did the same by cell phone to her friend Roxane Hawton (quite a haggler in her own right).

Then Matt called again! He told Monica that he could drop the price to $6800 with taxes, title, and all fees (that would be about $6300 without the fees). Monica was getting excited, and Mazhar’s instincts kicked in. He said, “Tell them you’ll take it for $6200, with all the fees. Then you'll get it for $6500). I was thinking $6300, but I thought I’d trust in his experience, so this time I called Matt back. I made sure that we could have it checked out by a mechanic on Monday and still bring it back, and then said, "I'm wondering if you can sell it for $6200. I have another Ford Windstar with leather seats that I really felt like I should at least drive on Monday, unless I can get the price lower." "Well, we've already cut almost all of the fat out of the deal. I can't go that low." Doh! Long pause. "Okay. I understand. I guess I'll go see the other minivan on Monday, and we'll just risk you selling it on Sunday because I don’t do business on Sunday. I guess we’ll probably call on Monday."

I resigned myself to the defeat, but then as we were talking more with Mazhar and Ina, I realized that maybe Monica could broker the deal, since she had been the Sacajawea-ish the go-between the whole time. And since she didn’t want to go driving around more on Monday anyway, she could honestly say that she’d rather go for the Grand Caravan and get the deal done on Saturday. She didn’t want to call though. She kept saying, “Are you kidding?” “Do I have to do it?” Of course she had to do it! This was Matt's way to declare a win too(in addition to making another sale). Matt could save face in Beamer borough by saying that he was trying to prevent any damage to our relationship by getting the car sold at a price I was happy with, and with the speed Monica was happy with.

So back to the cell phone Monica went, pacing in the Islam’s kitchen. “Hi Matt, it’s Monica again. Hans and I have been talking, and if we don’t get the deal done today, Hans wants to go see this other minivan on Monday, but I’m happy with this one. I think it’s a good deal, but Hans doesn’t want to buy it unless he can get it down to $6500 total.”

“Well, I have to go with what my manager says, and I don’t think we can come that low. We’ve already taken it down pretty low. I guess we’ll just have to see you on Monday.” Long pause again. So after this emotional rollercoaster, we still had no car, and neither of us really looked forward to spending another 4-8 hours on this on Monday. But, c’est la vie! You win some, you lose some.

Then, at 5:55 pm (5 minutes before closing), Monica was at Roxane’s house telling the whole story and she gets a phone call. She jokes, “Maybe that’s Matt. Eeeeeh. It is Matt!” “Hi Monica. So your husband would put down a deposit today if we sold it for $6500 total.” “Of course.” “I guess a couple of hundred dollars is not that big of a deal. If you will put up a deposit over the phone, we can make the deal.” W00T.

Since we had not had the minivan checked out, I didn’t let myself get totally excited yet, but Monday morning we went to the BMW dealership and met Matt. He was pretty much all business, although Monica did get out of him that he drives a Z4 and his wife drives a Z3. The paperwork was pretty fast (One perk of buying through a dealership is that it saves the time at the DMV with transferring the title). He didn’t try to pull any fast ones. He even had the car totally detailed and the tank filled with gas! The price of the car ended up being $6004, and $6500 with all the transfer fees, just as he promised (which I really value).

As we were feeling great about this purchase and were signing away, Monica said, “Is that Kenny Rogers?” Sure enough, as we were signing, we heard the sage advice, “You’ve got to, know when to hold ‘em, know when to fold ‘em, know when to walk away, know when to run…” How fitting!

So after paying for the car, we went straight to our mechanic, who checked out the vehicle and said that it was in really good shape and that it looked like it had been serviced at the dealership (someone trading up to a BMW would likely have a little more to spend on maintenance then most, I guess. “A little higher on the food chain” our mechanic said). Then we could celebrate. And to top it off, when I got home, I checked my e-mail and found out that I had passed my written preliminary examinations, so I will be able to go on to the dissertation stage and finish my PhD. That was a pretty good day!

Small sidenote to the story:

Monica was driving Conrad to cubscout day camp on Friday (four days after buying the minivan), and 3’x 3’ sheets of steel started falling out of an oncoming semi-trailer. They hit our minivan, bent in the front driver-side wheel, and damaged the front quarter-panel and door. Monica and Conrad were okay, but the car is now in the shop, and we are driving a rental, once again. Today, the shop called with the repair estimate: $6000!

* But signing meant that we only had 72 hours left of our rental car coverage, so I started looking online, which kept half of Thursday, all Friday, and most of Saturday. I looked on carsoup.com, cars.com, ebay, and craigslist (I still like it the best). We even called our dealer friends in Las Vegas and looked into that. I was looking to get the best minivan for $8000 or less. The research ended up to be useful because I was able to feel comfortable with which prices were good. I eliminated the Kia Sedona (which often comes with leather seats (one experience I’d like, but have never had) because they get poorer gas mileage) with the help of the motortrend comparison function. I used carfax ($35 for unlimited car history reports) for the first time too, which helped to avoid the cars that had been salvaged, etc.

Our Whirlwind Tour of the Midwest - 2 Amish town

Amish town was not part of our scheduled "Tour," but I'm so very happy that we stopped by for a couple of hours that Monday afternoon. At the first sight of an Amish woman gardening with her young son, I felt like we were Conquistadors invading the natives. Our loud van with loud children, engine and DVD player seemed too much for such a peaceful community.

This is not a typical stop sign in Amish town, but Hans got a kick out of the idea.

Hans also liked the idea of new age alternative fuel, (Toyota Prius) parked next to the old.

Conrad was inspired in this town as well. He has decided to practice his future veterinary medical career in the Amish communities. He loves the idea of bartering his services for food and livestock. I say more power to him. He'll have his year supply of wheat in no time.

This was the 1st time none of us minded an exceptionally slow driver.

(I took this by just putting my camera out through the front passenger window, while we were driving. We were amazed when we looked at the picture on the computer that you can see the man's face in the side view mirror (click on the photo - it's great). I'm sure the guy was sighing and thinking, "tourists!")

I had a sense that they probably don't like the paparazzi (I found out later that the Amish do indeed avoid being photographed), so this photo was taken by me, through the car (as Hans leaned back and rolled down his window, all while we were driving by slowly and inconspicuously (as a Kia minivan in Amish country can get). We're amazed it turned out. This was the only shot we had!

These bird houses were everywhere. My thought is, the houses keep the birds out of the barn. Just a guess.

These lilies grew abundantly wild by the side of the road

As we passed by the many green fields & white homes, we figured Monday must be laundry day because the clothes lines were filled with white, black, & blue clothes, which blew effortlessly in the wind. It was all so tranquil to watch. This was the most thought provoking trip I've ever been on. The idea of rejecting modern day distractions, so that one has more time to focus on family, is beautiful.
Don't worry, I'm not going to convert, but I needed this experience to shock me back into caring more about people and less about things and myself. I am humbled by the Amish community and hope I can focus on what is truly most important. My family.

Our Whirlwind Tour of the Midwest - 1

This was such a great vacation. Hans is all about power packing our trips so that we can maximize our time. He Googlemaps the major stops (although we should probably get some better maps to deal with unplanned detours), prepays for every hotel and call in advance so that our friends and family know we are coming. This vacation was just a well thought out as the rest. Our 1st stop was Michigan to visit our dear friends, Rebecca & Michael Miller. We met them in France and to this day I swear Rebecca saved my life, my mind and soul during our stay in France. I couldn't have survived without Rebecca's refined femininity, Christlike kindness, and genuine sincerity. Michael is a hoot to say the least. The night we stayed with them we talked until the wee hours, just like we had done in France. We're so happy that he found a job that utilizes his many talents in philosophy, economic development, business, and humor (he works at the Acton Institute, a think-tank promoting Religion and Liberty). It was a perfect way to start our vacation.
Our next stop was Canada, to visit Jon and Jeanette McEachran. Jon and Hans were best friends in high school and have kept in touch pretty well through a group they formed called the BC (that's a whole separate post, but it would have to be encrypted since this blog is open to the public). Jon and Jeanette have built a wonderful life in Sarnia (a border town NE of Detroit). He is bishop of the local church ward and is busy building a warehousing and rail car-switching business to help the local chemical companies).
We had never been to Canada until this trip and were worried about culture shock :). In fact, Jon was able to translate for us and introduced us to the local exotic delicacy, "chips" which are actually "freedom fries" in Yankee country, but they are sprinkled (or sprayed, with a small hose - not kidding) with vinegar.

Conrad in Canada.
The bridge in the background links the US and Canada and was defaced by Riley, who could not "hold it" as we were ever-so-slowly advancing to the border crossing.

Amelia, Aunt Hannah & Conrad at a 4th of July BBQ
(What the heck are they looking at?)

Grandpa Allspach (97) with the boys.

Riley & Conrad in their new Cincinnati Reds ball caps.

Hans & Amelia.
(Yes Hans is wearing a pinky-peach tie)

I don't know why, but Riley really really loves playing chess, so on our Sunday visit with Grandpa the boys had a nice little scrimmage.

Hans' aunt Louis lives Trenton, Ohio and this... is her driveway.

Amelia looks so lady-like holding her skirt.
She's actually just trying to squish ants with her pink jellys.

Riley found a goose feather

(One might be thinking, is that sanitary? He's good at washing his hands & taking his vitamins. I pick my battles.)

Conrad, Conrad, Conrad...

(I know, no shoes at a barn, ie: tetanus. He's current on his vaccines. I pick my battles.)

leaves of grass

It rained a lot on our whirlwind trip through the midwest, but with rain come newness & beauty. If you look closely, you can see tiny hairs on one of the blades of grass. I think the hairs are called stomata.

When I heard the Learn’d Astronomer
Walt Whitman (1819–1892). Leaves of Grass. 1900.

WHEN I heard the learn’d astronomer;
When the proofs, the figures, were ranged in columns before me;
When I was shown the charts and the diagrams, to add, divide, and measure them;
When I, sitting, heard the astronomer, where he lectured with much applause in the lecture-room,
How soon, unaccountable, I became tired and sick;	5
Till rising and gliding out, I wander’d off by myself,
In the mystical moist night-air, and from time to time,
Look’d up in perfect silence at the stars. I first read this in 7th grade and it is still by far one of my favorite pieces of free verse poetry. (I even thought about embroidering it on a pillow.) I know this poem has nothing to do with my picture, but Walt Whitman's collection of poems are entitled Leaves of Grass, so I figured I could put them together.